Lord, I Just Want To Be The Best Me That I Can Be...
That was my prayer this morning as I got teary eyed while reading Bon Appetit magazine. There is a passion simmering within me that hasn't come to a boil in a couple years now. I used to love to impress my husband, family and friends with my culinary prowess. I was the go-to person among my friends for birthday cakes. What happened? Life. For some reason, somehow, cooking became a necessity, not an opportunity. Even a burden. How did this happen?
My husband's number one favorite pastime is eating. When he sees me in the kitchen with an apron on, he lights up. It's his favorite vision. I've been to so many cooking schools and courses, including a week in Tuscany, that I have the ability to whip up an impressive meal with deft surety. And yet...I don't. I'm a terrible wife.
This is what is running through my head as I read this long lost magazine. It has been replaced by books, blogs, courses, podcasts, and articles on gluten-free, glutamates, adrenal failure, thyroid disease, gut microbiome, hormone dysfunction, and leaky gut syndrome.
Is there a balance? Can the two passions be brought together? My desire to be a chef and my passion for health and wellness?
As I read through the recipes, I see opportunity. Clean, basic food, brought to exquisite heights through technique and creativity. No, I don't need to add the "mayo," but I can whip up an aioli with organic eggs, lemons and heart healthy, brain supporting, olive oil. Good food that can sustain us, mind body and soul are within easy reach. It isn't difficult. Why am I listening to people who ask me "What CAN you eat?" as though healthy means restricted. Healthy is not restrictive, It's an opportunity to bring food back to beauty and life. An opportunity to toss aside the mindset that it needs to be fast and commercial to taste good.
Lord help me to be the best person I can be. The best wife that I can be. Show me how to marry my passions and gifts into being the wife and friend that you made me to be.